I’ve tried to write this post so many times. For a few months now I’ve had overwhelming thought processes on what it means to be a strong woman, and how the word ‘strong’ makes me feel.
Firstly I’d like say that I’ve taken full responsibility for the paths in life I’ve chosen so far, and I have grown to love myself, my mind and my body. That is a feeling I never thought I would have.
Reading my past posts on this blog naturally make me cringe, because I have changed so much. But I respect that I wrote certain things at a time that I felt appropriate, and in a way it documents part of my journey.
However, looking back, I was still in denial about certain aspects of my life. To be more specific, I was unaware of the damaging effects my last relationship had on my self-esteem, and how it induced a heavy anxiety that I never had before. It scared me to be so honest with myself. Recently I was having a discussion with someone about the different types of abuse in relationships. It’s easy to recognise and quantify physical abuse, as horrible as it is, because it is visible in a physical form. Emotional abuse however, is so difficult to see, and the scars left in the aftermath can last a lifetime for some people. I was afraid to admit to myself that I had experienced years of emotional abuse, but once I did, everything changed. I started recognising that my anxiety, my low self esteem and all that came with it, were the scars that were left over that had to be healed.
All of the above realisations happened a very long time ago. I’ve taken responsibility for my own happiness. I have fallen in love with learning about myself, exploring my body, my sexuality and my mind. I am so grateful for the tough times because without them I wouldn’t be who I am today, I wouldn’t have the confidence and strength I have now.
There truly is beauty in pain, and strength in vulnerability. It is such a good feeling to be 100% yourself with no apologies. I feel constantly inspired by the amazing women in my life, the ability to put on a smile and keep going no matter what is going on underneath. I feel empowered. I feel proud of myself for having the strength to work on my mind and explore the origins of my negative thinking. I feel proud of my mother, my sisters, my beautiful female friends, who can, all in their own way, make something blossom out of something negative.
In the end, it all comes down to love. Even in the hardest of times, it is love that pulls us out. Love for ourselves, our families, friends and partners. Love your scars. I am constantly surprised that no matter how much you think you have been knocked down, there is always more love to give.
I feel it’s an exciting time to be a woman, something to celebrate. With albums from artists like Beyoncé, Solange, A Tribe Called Quest, and many more touching on the sexualisation of women, the divide between the sexes, and the empowerment of women all over the world. We need to lift each other up. We need to celebrate our strengths and know that it is infinite. You are all amazing and don’t be afraid to accept every part of yourself. Don’t underestimate your strength.
“There is no such thing as a weak woman” – Beyoncé
“I’m a woman phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, that’s me” – Maya Angleou
Love to you all,